Maturing Toward Wholeness in the Inner Life
Healing the Pain That Is Blocking My Maturing
1 – At some point, living as Christ’s disciple, I am likely to become aware of wounded areas within that are hindering or blocking my maturing.
2 – Craziness began when I turned from God and went my own way. Sanity is gradually returning as I rely on Jesus to teach me how life works.
3 – My dysfunctions come from
- my own sin
- sin done against me
- my sinful responses to sin done against me
- sin all around me in family/society.
4 – I am wounded by the inability to accept myself. I am out of touch with the person I truly am, created in the likeness of a magnificent God.
5 – I am wounded by expecting or demanding that other people meet my needs. I am looking to the wrong person. Only God can meet my needs.
6 – I am wounded by self-centeredness (introspection, narcissism). I am looking at the wrong person. Jesus teaches me God-centeredness.
7 – I am wounded by dishonoring my parents. If I am unable to relate well with them, I will relate in unhealthy ways with other authorities.
8 – I am wounded by anger, contempt, bitterness. They are violent behaviors; they trigger violence in return. People avoid an angry person.
9 – I am wounded by sexual violation—what I may have committed or what I may have suffered. God created sexuality to express a unique intimacy.
10 – I am wounded by shame. Shame keeps me from being honest about my need and seeking help. It expresses a distorted understanding of myself.
11 – I am wounded by my inability to forgive—to commit my enemy to God and leave payback to him. God is Judge—a role he has not assigned to me.
12 – I am wounded by my inability to receive forgiveness. I cannot deserve forgiveness; it is a gift God offers me. I may need to forgive myself.
13 – I am wounded by assuming a victim role. If I am a child of God I am never a victim. Why? I have a Heavenly Father upon whom I must choose to rely.
14 – My Heavenly Father has allowed what happened to me for reasons known only to him. What he knows now I may only understand years from now—or maybe never.
15 – Could it be that my own behavior and responses played a role in the wrong done? What is the objective truth? Do I see all this accurately?
16 – God is good, all-wise, always with me, working all things for my good. Responding correctly to what I can’t understand is crucial to healing.
17 – Unhealed places within me trap me in immature thinking and reacting. Unresolved childhood pain erupts in childish adult behavior.
18 – Unhealed places within me energize addictions—deeply entrenched habits I use to avoid my pain. I soon find myself in bondage to them.
19 – Unhealed places within me result in me wounding other people. Anger lies near the surface, easily triggered. Wounded people wound people.
20 – Unhealed places within me hinder ministry. I lack insight why I, and others, act as we do. I have a log in my eye. Self-control eludes me.
21 – I am healed by coming present to God and remaining there. I hear my Father say “I love you.” I come to believe him. Healing goes deeper.
22 – I am healed by listening for words of healing insight my Father is always ready to speak. I hear loving, specific correction. I obey.
23 – I am healed by bringing my sins to Jesus on the cross. Guilt and habitual sin block healing and wound anew. The cross has broken sin’s power.
24 – I am healed by bringing my past wounding to Jesus on the cross. I bring him the painful memories. I ask him to step into them with me and heal them.
25 – I am healed by forgiving those who have wronged me. I do not deny or minimize what is true, but I leave “pay back”—judgment—to God.
26 – I am healed by living daily as Jesus’ apprentice. He teaches me how to avoid harmful behaviors and follow ways that lead to wholeness.
27 – Jesus is the most skilled therapist in all of history. His teachings show
- how we are made
- what went wrong
- how it can be made right.
28 – As I mature in the life of God, I come to see that I have been wounded more by my own wrong responses than by the actions of others.
29 – I have no control over the actions of others. They are not my responsibility. My well-being cannot depend on what is not my responsibility.
30 – My well-being depends on my own choices. I can learn to respond in redemptive ways to the wrong actions of others. Jesus teaches me how.
31 – We are not healed by analytical thinking—even analyzing the Bible. Living in our heads is not enough. We are healed in God’s Presence.
32 – We are not healed by counseling, though godly counsellors can be a great help. But counseling is not enough. We are healed in God’s Presence.
33 – Jesus
- announced the gospel of the kingdom
- taught the kingdom’s principles
- revealed the kingdom’s presence by healing. (Matthew 9:35-36)
Draft: Last edited—November 22, 2016
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